Seasons of Shabbat

Shabbat experiences are part of our lives, and they change over the course of a lifetime. The Shabbat we remember (or don’t) from our childhoods is not the Shabbat we will have as new parents. Single adults will have a different Shabbat, as will empty nesters.

There is no “perfect” Shabbat. Stop looking for it. Instead, experience the Shabbat that comes. Sometimes it will seem peaceful and holy, and sometimes the sink will stop up or the baby will wail half the night. Sometimes we are surrounded by people, sometimes we are alone.

Shabbat simply is. She comes with the sunset and will leave 24 hours later. In between it is up to us to make of her what we can, what we will.

Shabbat shalom.

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Rabbi Ruth Adar is a teaching rabbi based in San Leandro, CA. She has many hats: rabbi, mom, poodle groomer, and ham radio operator K6RAV. She blogs at https://coffeeshoprabbi.com/ as the Coffee Shop Rabbi.

5 thoughts on “Seasons of Shabbat”

  1. Rabbi Ruth, thank you, so much….this is exactly what I need. Had a really bad week, lots of different things, having to sort through my husbands things for the first time( and finding that the little purse of emergency money -his last two years were in a nursing home – was missing….no proof, a “their word against mine” situation….there were a lot of problems at the home) and feeling overwhelmingly lost. I miss “us” so much. Your words helped. Thank you


    1. I’m glad it helped, Alex. Those lost items in the nursing home are a frequent occurrence; residents are often sure that they had something, and that they know where they had it, so it “must have been stolen.” While nursing home employees are used to this happening, it is always painful to be accused. If you would like to do a great kindness, dropping them a note that it was found might be a nice thing to do.


      1. Alas, I didn’t word that very well…”finding it was gone”, as in, it wasn’t there, and should have been. The nursing home in question was going through huge problems, which put an extra load of stress on me(fortunately I was able to deal with most of it, and keep Alastair out of it, as much as .I could, but it put even more stress into what was an already unbearably stressful time)
        There was such a lot – police, Scottish Care Inspectorate, teems of social workers….and it was a daily battle. Alastair was almost blind, most of the staff were agency workers, changing all the time, English not their first language, and got tremendously anxious and upset as he couldn’t understand them.
        Fortunately the local GP practice were wonderful, helped a lot, I could call them any time( and did) and tried to do their best in a very difficult situation.
        The only decent staff left, as they could not take the stress….there were four, or five(I lost count) managers, each one worse than the last, and this was not free…..we were paying a lot. The actual company running it changed their name in the middle of it all( did they really think that’s suddenly – no warning, just a letter announcing they had done so – calling themselves “Embrace” would mean everything was ok?)
        And then there was the overcharging…..over £2,000. And I couldn’t tell Alastair any of this, as the shock would have been too much…..
        Sorry…..just all came flooding back…..


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