A great question came up in class last night, and I’ve been thinking on it ever since. A student asked:
You say that Judaism is about actions, not about belief. But how does that connect to whether a person is Jewish or not?
Being Jewish is a state of relationship between an individual and the Jewish People. A person cannot become Jewish by him- or herself: a person is Jewish because of a particular relationship, either a birth into a Jewish family or an adoption-like process later in life. A person either is or isn’t Jewish; there are no intermediate states. (Note: “Who’s a Jew?” is a major source of disagreement in the Jewish world. If you have questions about your status, talk with your rabbi.)
Being Jewish is a mixed bag. On the one hand, it is an identity which makes me part of something larger than myself and gives me full membership in the Jewish People. On the other hand, it makes me a potential target for antisemitism which can materialize anywhere, anytime. And yes, as a Jew I am responsible for many sacred duties. Even if I do not observe them at a particular time in my life, I know they are there.
Jewish actions include those sacred duties (mitzvot) but they also carry the real rewards of Judaism. “Doing Jewish” includes:
- the weekly miracle of Shabbat
- saying the Shema “when I lie down and when I rise up:” daily prayer
- a cycle of holidays and observances
- life cycle traditions that enrich my passage through life
- teaching Judaism to my children and/or to newer members of my community
- mobilizing to assist other Jews both nearby and far away
- participation in a Jewish community where I can develop relationships with people and grow from those relationships
- a template for grief and mourning that will embrace me just as my life seems to spin out of control
- access to the great treasury of Jewish thought, thousands of years of road-tested advice about how to handle life’s most challenging moments
- and many, many more things
Many of those benefits are available not only to Jews but to others as well. Non-Jewish friends of the Jewish people are welcome at our Shabbat, seder and study tables. More and more synagogues are developing policies that make synagogue life available to non-Jewish spouses and relatives while preserving the boundaries that maintain authentic Jewish life.
Becoming Jewish, crossing that line between not-Jewish and Jewish, is a complex experience. Some things don’t change: I had been going to services and doing many other Jewish things for years. Some things were new after the mikveh: once I became a Jew, I was doing mitzvot not only because I wanted to, but because they had become part of my sacred duties as a Jew. And yes, there were things I could now do that I could not do before. My rabbi would perform a wedding for me. I could wear a tallit and be called to the Torah.
Being Jewish and doing Jewish are really two separate but related things. This is sometimes confusing to people from other traditions.