On Mother’s Day

Mother’s Day

Have mercy on Mother’s Day
for not everyone has a Hallmark life:

Some want with all their hearts to have a child to hold
and they can’t, just can’t.

Some yearn for the child who is gone
and their heart breaks over and over like clockwork every day.

Some ache for the children taken from them by politics
or murder, or a drunk driver, or bad luck.

Some gave a child up – it was “for the best” –
and now they wonder every day: where is she? What’s she doing?

Have mercy on Mother’s Day
because not everyone had a Hallmark life:

Their mom was sick or selfish
or she went missing one dark night and never came back
or she lived on her own private planet
perhaps some kind of hell.
Or it hurts even to be in the room with her
because she bites, like an injured mother cat
all claws and teeth.

Perhaps their mom was a child herself
Perhaps we’ll never know
They’ll never tell

Have mercy on Mother’s Day
Have mercy on all the mothers
All the children
Have mercy.

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Published by

rabbiadar

Rabbi Ruth Adar is a teaching rabbi based in San Leandro, CA. She has many hats: rabbi, mom, poodle groomer, and ham radio operator K6RAV. She blogs at https://coffeeshoprabbi.com/ as the Coffee Shop Rabbi.

13 thoughts on “On Mother’s Day”

  1. This is outstanding. I wish everyone could read it. I shared it on Facebook, so maybe that one person I know besides myself will find it. Me? I’m the mother who lost a child, and my heart breaks “like clockwork” every day. I’ve also lost my mother, with whom I was finally close, after a difficult childhood. Mother’s Day is a tough one for a lot of us. Thanks for the acknowledgement of that in such a beautiful way.

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  2. Thank you, a Rabbi Ruth….once again you touch the spot within me that is seldom reached. The description here…..
    ….Their mom was sick or selfish
    or she went missing one dark night and never came back
    or she lived on her own private planet
    perhaps some kind of hell.
    Or it hurts even to be in the room with her…..
    …..
    Is that of my mother. As you know, now gone, I talk to her, quite often; I ask her if she understands now, and tell her that I understand just a little better; I miss her. I miss what we never had….she could not be the mother I needed, I could not be the daughter she needed. I knew that….she did not. I’m not a mother, but I have been a long time caregiver, to my husband, and I am Mamma to my cats: that description, “on her own private planet” is one I shall keep. It makes me feel a little more whole. It’s not Mother’s Day here in the UK….ours is tied into the Christian calendar, falling usually in March. Thank you again, and Im so glad to be a reader/follower here.
    Alex

    Liked by 1 person

  3. There is so much to say on the Hallmark holidays! I am fortunate enough to be able to pass on Mother’s day celebration with a quip saying that we French Jews don’t celebrate because of the reminiscence of Vichy government who installed it (true fact but long forgotten in France too) and that it coincides with my mother’s and my own birthdays very often.

    Holidays (the real ones) can already be difficult for many but they still have a meaning and can be sensitive to everyone’s circumstances. Hallmark holidays are not. Thank you for your marvelous sensitivity and the way you express it, making it possible to redeem the hurt and bring a spiritual dimension to the calendar.

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  4. Reblogged this on One Day at a Time and commented:
    There is so much to say on the Hallmark holidays! I am fortunate enough to be able to pass on Mother’s day celebration with a quip saying that we French Jews don’t celebrate because of the reminiscence of Vichy government who installed it (true fact but long forgotten in France too) and that it coincides with my mother’s and my own birthdays very often.

    Holidays (the real ones) can already be difficult for many but they still have a meaning and can be sensitive to everyone’s circumstances. Hallmark holidays are not. Thank you for Rabbi Ruth Adar’s marvelous sensitivity and the way she expresses it, making it possible to redeem the hurt and bring a spiritual dimension to the calendar.

    Like

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